Broken Wheel

This short story is based on a song called “Kolmas pyörä” from Chisu


I wonder how is it so difficult to send just one tiny message with no importance. Why is it that every time I think about that message I feel like I’m drowning in the deep dark waters of desperation.  The inability to send that message is frustrating and frightening. While staring at the empty white paper in front of my eyes I can’t help but to wonder, is that person thinking about me at all. I’m empty and forgotten piece of something which used to matter a long time ago. As I stare at the white paper memories begin to form in my mind reminding me yet again of my lonely existence.

There was a time when I was happy, time when I was with someone. I took care of her when no one else did. She noticed me when no one else acknowledged me. I wanted our dream to continue forever. The HE came along and started my nightmare all over again. HE made me feel invisible again and questioned her. HE wanted to steal my sun, my peaceful dream, my source of life and replace them with cruel reality of madness. I tried to protect her from herself and HIM.

A startling noise pulls me back from my memories. She is back in the house but I can no longer see her. It almost feel like she was never here although she has always been here. Even when she was a child I was with her, supporting and helping her. Never loved by any one seemed to be her fate until she realized that I would remain by her side. Things are different now. She is closing her eyes escaping from me. I am fading away slowly.

I am the third wheel in this tale. Or I would be. As I fade away I know she is going to be happy. I was with her for as long as I was needed. She no longer need me which is why I’m fading. I was never truly there. How I wish HE would disappear as I vanish now. Without HIM we could still be happy. HE whispered in her ears and made her doubtful. I was blocking her memories, an imagined being born from her nightmares. I wish I could be the third wheel, but I can’t even be a normal wheel since I never existed in the first place. As I merge with the shadows of her past, she is going to move on and follow the reality.

I finally know what to write.

I woke up feeling better than ever. The latest therapy session helped me a lot and I’m starting to think that I’m getting better. Until I noticed a piece of paper and saw those words of honesty.


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